I didn’t serve in the military. As my father — a three-time Vietnam combat veteran — liked to remind me, I “never missed a meal or heard a shot fired in anger.”
That makes my writing about Veterans Day feel a bit presumptuous at first. But perhaps that’s exactly why civilians like myself should speak up.
Veterans Day, after all, is not only for those who served — it is also for those of us who benefitted from their service, and who owe them something more than quiet appreciation.
Americans often confuse the meaning of Veterans Day and Memorial Day. The latter is a day of mourning, devoted to those who died in combat. It’s a somber time to quietly acknowledge their sacrifices.
Veterans Day is different. It is a celebration of gratitude for all those who served — a day to look living veterans in the eye and acknowledge what their willingness to serve has meant for the rest of us. It is a day when the stories of veterans are highlighted on a national scale for the nation to grapple with.
The holiday began as Armistice Day in 1918, marking the end of World War I — a global catastrophe so devastating that H.G. Wells optimistically called it “the war to end all wars.” The war saw more than forty million military and civilian casualties in 4 years — an average of 6,000 service members dying each day.
The U.S. fought in that war for just over a year, yet suffered more than 300,000 casualties, including tens of thousands lost to influenza. My grandfather, George S. Patton, Jr. — a colonel and tank commander at the time — was wounded in France during that year. Coincidentally, he was also born on Nov. 11.
When President Gerald Ford redesignated the holiday as Veterans Day in 1978, the gesture broadened its meaning. As the Department of Veterans Affairs defines it, the day honors those who served for their “patriotism, love of country, and willingness to serve and sacrifice for the common good.”
Growing up, my parents emphasized the sacrifice of service over what that service entailed. We must honor all veterans — not only those who faced gunfire but everyone who raised their hand, took the oath, and wore the uniform.
Service takes many forms, and my grandfather understood that. In his well known addresses in the field, he often stressed the importance of every soldier: “The ordnance men are needed to supply the guns; the quartermaster is needed to bring up the food and clothes. Every last damn man in the mess hall, even the one who boils the water to keep us from getting [the runs], has a job to do.”
We often say we can never repay our veterans for the sacrifices they’ve made. Although this is true, it cannot become an excuse for doing too little or nothing at all. Veterans Day should remind us that gratitude is not optional. It is our civic duty.
The flyovers, parades, speeches, and handshakes that are given today do matter. So does the work that is done year-round to support veterans’ mental and physical well being, ease transitions into civilian life, and care for families of those who have served. Most of all, we must listen — really listen — to the stories of what they have lived through.
They did their job. So on the mere handful of days when we honor our veterans, we are reminded that it is our turn to do ours.
This Veterans Day, know that it is your turn to do more than offer an obligatory “Thank you for your service.” Look a veteran in the eye. Ask about his or her service. Be interested not interesting. And really mean it. Veterans will know it if you do, and I promise you will feel that appreciation in your heart.
Benjamin Patton is the founder and executive director of the Patton Veterans Project. He is the grandson of World War II commander General George S. Patton, Jr. and son of Major General George S. Patton IV, a veteran of the Korean and Vietnam conflicts.
