A single person wonders what they did wrong after being the first to witness their friend’s child take their first steps. They posted on the “Am I The A**hole?” subreddit, wondering why the child’s mom is so upset with them when they only had good intentions. Surprisingly, the reactions were pretty split.
The original poster (OP) stated that they are still close with an old childhood friend and often hang out with him, his wife, and their child, who is a toddler. Sometimes, they even watch the little girl while the couple goes on a date night.
“Every once in a blue moon, they ask me to watch her for a few hours while my friend and his wife get some date time or whatever they need to do. So I was hanging out with her and I know that they’ve been trying to get her to take her first steps. I read about a trick where if you make them hold something then they will walk without holding onto a surface. So I gave her a toy and filmed it and it worked!” they wrote.
“I sent the video to them and my friend didn’t care, he was just happy but his wife was pissed! She was mad at me that they weren’t there for that big moment. I don’t have the type of relationship with her where I can have a deep 1 on 1 with her but I talked to my friend about it and he’s not upset with me but his wife still is. She thinks I robbed her if a key moment. I did get it on film but I get what she’s saying.”
They ended the post by clarifying that they “had no malicious intent” but now wonder if they are the a**hole for encouraging the child to walk while her parents were gone.
The nuance of whether or not the OP is in the wrong seems to, according to Redditors, land on the point that they encouraged the child to learn to walk instead of just happening to be there while it happened.
“YTA for doing it on purpose and then sending them video. Kids often have their first steps when they are in daycare and the teachers purposely don’t tell the parents so when they finally see their kid walk they think it’s the first time. You purposely took that moment from them,” one user wrote.
Another echoed, “I was prepared to say N T A because usually there’s not much you can do about a baby having a first whatever on your watch. If the baby just got up and took a step on her own, that’s solidly N T A.
But YTA for trying a new technique to get baby to walk without checking with the parents first. They asked you to watch baby not hold a personal training session with her. I think you overstepped.”
“YTA for specifically trying to get the kid to walk while the parents weren’t around. If the kid happened to walk on its own with you present, that would be one thing. The reality is, you stole a moment from those parents that they will never get back and that’s not cool,” another said.
And while several other Reddit users took this stance, there were some others (particularly parents) who didn’t really think that the OP overstepped.
“I’m a mom of an only child, and quite frankly I don’t remember when she took her first steps, and idgaf either. I’d appreciate my friend helping my child and also that she filmed it if this happened to me,” one mom wrote.
“Mom of 4 here and idgaf either. I get that it sucks to miss out on milestones—but it happens. A lot of us are out here working to support our kids, and the reality is, you’re not going to witness every single ‘first.’ Between work, date nights, caring for other kids, and just keeping up with life, it’s impossible.
If a milestone I miss happens to be caught on camera, that’s awesome—but if not, that’s okay too. It’s just not realistic to think you’ll be there for every one of their firsts. It would be lovely if life worked that way, but it doesn’t,” another said.
Read the entire Reddit thread here.
